Hey Lou Writes

The Grey Matters


Do One Thing Every Day That Scares You

“Behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out.” – James Bryant Conant

That’s what I’m trying to do right now. In fact, I even bought this little book from Urban Outfitters.

writing. things that scare you, life, inspiration


I saw it and went, YES! This is quite possibly exactly what I need!

The catch is, I’m not nearly organized enough to actually sit down and fill out a book like this. You’re supposed to fill in the date and answer the question they’ve given on each page and let the quote on said page inspire you. Will I keep up with it? Hopefully.

I’ve already been doing a lot lately that scares me. It hasn’t been on purpose. So I’m left wondering… does this whole idea of living life to the fullest have to be intentional? Or does it count just as much if what you’re doing is leaning on the edge of survival instincts?

The first page asks you to fill out a list of things that scare you. I can only think of a few things.

1) Creepy people (mostly men). Which is why I walk around with a knitting needle in my purse. Think about it… it’s probably the best unassuming weapon a girl could have on her.

2) Being late. Which is why I am usually 15 minutes early to everything. I like to scope out where I’m going, get there early, and possibly wait in the car and read.

3) Letting life pass me by.Β I’m only 24, but sometimes I wonder how the heck 24 years of my life have already passed. I wonder if I should have accomplished some huge goal by now. I wonder if I’ve made the right decisions.

4) Books about a really horrible future for mankind. AKA, Brave New World, The Road, 1984, The Hunger Games, Farenheit 451… just to name a few. I’m terrified that these stories might come true. Even if not for me, but for the future generations. Which is partly why I refuse to have a smartphone. (yes, it’s true)

5) Too much technology. I really like getting back to the basics. I’ve written about it before, but I prefer not to have a smartphone, a microwave, television, or get online very often. I get paranoid about “them” controlling us and having access to our every move and choice. I prefer to use an oven or stove to heat up my leftovers. I prefer a book over a TV show. I prefer writing letters to text messages. I don’t think all technology is bad, just like I don’t think ALL of Western medicine is bad. But I think enough of it is to be wary. Sometimes I feel like I can literally feel my brain turning to mush….. unless I read all day long, then my brain returns to its normal state.

That’s just the tip of the ice burg, but those are the first 5 fears that came to mind.

In the next weeks I’ll be sharing what SCARY thing I’m doing each day and how I felt about it. In the meantime, I’d love to know your biggest fears and how you plan to overcome them… or how you’ve already overcome them in life.Β 

Now, along with fears, I have a good friend who reminded me that it also takes courage to do something you ENJOY every day. He said, “Why not also try to do something for yourself each day. Maybe that would be even better.”

I’m all for a happy medium.

I’ll try to share the little joys I find each day, too. The most recent joy I had was watching my sister’s band play at the Biopark here in Albuquerque, and having my nephew Carson on my lap the entire time. We listened to the music, danced, and wound up playing “star wars” with light sabers (aka twigs) and laughing.

things that scare you, inspiration, life, not being afraid

Carson <3

As always, thanks for taking time to stop by Hey Lou!!!!




What’s The Deal With Hair? (aka I got my herr did)

So, for those of you who might not know, this past summer I chopped all of my hair off.

pixie cut, blog, hair cut, short hair, girl boy cut

hair transformation

You can read about that day here.

Now, months later and ZERO regrets, I want to tell you why I love the choice I made so much. I want to tell you what I’ve learned about hair and how I now relate it to myself and the world.

It’s just hair. BUT hair is important in so many ways… culturally, historically, gender(ly) and confidence(ly). (wasn’t sure how to make that sentence work, but you get the point.)

Women curl their hair and buy products and spend time, precious time, on their hair to make it shiny and bouncy and full-bodied and touchable. Some women can grow out their hair, some can’t make it past their shoulders. Sometimes people lose their hair. Sometimes guys grow out their hair. Sometimes people shave their heads.

pixie cuts, hair cuts, short hair, cutting your hair blog

greg, who sometimes shave his head, and me, with long hair

If you think about it, we all say something with our appearance each day and a huge part of that has to do with hair. Millions of tiny little things growing out of our heads. Kinda weird!

I have no problem with anyone who spends money on hair, after all, I do it, too. I also have NO problem with people who spend an hour doing their hair each day. It’s their time, not mine!

However, here we go, and I’ll tell you why I love this short ‘do so much and I might even convince you to chop all of your hair off.

pixie cuts, short hair, blog, cutting your hair off

so long, long herr


One cool thing about short hair has to do with TIME. I save so much time. I’ve mentioned on Hey Lou how time is something I prefer not to waste. I want to do things on my own time, I hate waiting around… I don’t like really long daily processes. I was sick of blow drying my hair and/or waiting for it to air dry. I was sick of having to curl it to feel “fancy.” I was tired of choosing between a ponytail, bun, or down.

Job interview, church, grocery store, working out, meeting a friend for coffee… sweat pants… a dress….. SAME HAIR!!! (some girls probably want the ability to change it up. guess I’m not one of them…)

short hair, change, the pickaxe

this took two minutes. maybe. and there was no big decision to make!

I no longer dread taking a shower. Because washing my hair meant taking all that time to do it. And I had to use so much shampoo and conditioner for my hair to feel okay. It took so long to get all of the product out, too. Now I get my hair wet and I actually wash it with a product maybe once a week. It’s the best!!!

pixie cuts, blog, short hair for women, women with boy hair cuts

ten minutes after my SHORT shower

CHEAPER hair cuts!!!!! I get the “men’s price,” which is up to ten dollars cheaper. Also, in the hair cutting world….

No more asking scary and intimidating women with awesome hair where they got it done!!! Nope. Instead, I ask the 20 year old guy I work with where he gets his hair cut. I like his style. Turns out, it’s a very well priced ($ rather than $$$) barber shop. I’m going there this week! To a barber shop!! Isn’t that cool?!

I gave my hair to Locks of Love. You can always donate. If your hair is long enough you can donate without a pixie cut. But why not just go all out? My mom won her battle with breast cancer and although she didn’t lose any hair, I still felt a new connection with her and the women who feel a painful loss when their hair falls out. I want to be a part of the world that says, you are beautiful either way.



You can have the same hair cut as your super cute nephew, and he’ll think it’s silly. :) When I let it grow a little and do “the flip” in the front, my four year old nephew and I have literally, the exact same hair.

pixie cut, short hair, blog


It feels damn good. No more knots!!! No more tangles!!! No more hair getting stuck in your lip gloss!! No more painful follicles after having a pontytail in all day long!!! The wind reaches your neck, ears, forehead…. that’s freeing. It really is.

You might stop caring so much about what you look like. It’s actually shocking how much short hair has affected this. I used to stress way more about my appearance. I would worry how my hair looked, how my makeup looked with the hair style I chose, the shirt I wore and whether it went with the bun I just placed on the top of my head. I also compared my looks to others. It’s not like having less than an inch of hair is magical, but in a way, it’s sort of magical. It’s like my hair is a nonentity. I don’t think much about it and I can’t change it… it will not grow back overnight, so… there’s nothing to worry about. The choice is made. It is how it is. Comparing won’t get me anywhere. And maybe because of this and maybe because I like how I look more than ever, I just don’t do the comparing anymore.

And that’s why cutting my hair was so liberating.Β I said, “The only person who needs to like my hair is me.” That’s a liberating feeling. I have no other umm… assets, when it comes to people looking elsewhere other than at my face. Instead of being chesty or having some other feminine quality, I had pretty good long hair. I don’t want to sound conceited, I don’t think people just loved my hair so much and looked past the rest of me, but now I know for sure that people are seeing ME… MELINDA… and my face will not be covered by my hair. I wore it down most of the time and that was my comfort zone. Maybe I didn’t like how I looked that day so I could “hide” behind my messy hair. No longer. It has forced me OUT of my comfort zone. It’s liberated me from being just a girl with long hair.

Does that make sense? It did in my head

Another angle of the herr

Another angle of the herr

I felt a new energy. I think that since hair has been with us throughout the years and was there for experiences, good and bad, it holds a lot of that negative and positive energy. Might sound hokey, but I believe in things like that. When it was chopped off a huge burden was lifted off of me and all of the bad things that had happened were thrown away with the hair that was swept up off the parlor floor.

The amount of time I’ve spent missing my hair: zero minutes. This is entirely true. I got the chop and never looked back. It’s a non issue. I focus my energy on other things, I ‘spose.

Plus, it WILL grow back, if I ever decide to grow it back, which I doubt I will. Case in point:

my sister once had a pixie.

pixie cut

my twin!!!! a long time ago!

look at us now!


we switched places.

At the end of the day, hair is a powerful thing and it’s hard to explain quite why.

It was powerful enough to put me in a new situation. I stopped hiding behind the hair, I stopped hiding behind other things in my life. I can spend more time doing the things I love and going for my goals and less time getting ready in the morning or obsessing over how I styled the stuff on my head. I’ve had the opportunity to look past the appearance I was sooooooo comfortable with and step into a new one… and it was a lot easier than I thought it would be.

I surprised myself.

I never thought I’d write a blog like this one, today.

It sounds like I had this big decision and a lot of people have told me how gutsy cutting all that hair off was. But the point (you’ll read about if you read the blog, The Chop) is…. I woke up one day and I did it. I’m finally comfortable with myself and how I look and it has nothing to do with something that I depended on for most of my life. That feels good. It’s mostly a subconscious thing…truly. I don’t think about it that often, but it’s been fun to see the positive reactions of those around me. I’ve been thinking about writing this blog for a while, especially once I asked a boy for the hair tips and I just had to chuckle at myself.

Life is good, without or without much hair.

I’ve been thinking about buzzing it lately. (follow me on Pinterest and you’ll see what I’m loving!) Β It grows back too quickly, what have I got to lose?

I’ll let you know. :)

maybe again one day, maybe not

maybe again one day, maybe not

Love, Happy Pixie Lou