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The Grey Matters


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Day 12 of the Blog Every SINGLE Day in May challenge…..

What do you miss? (a person, a thing, a place, a time in your life…?)

This is a loaded question. What do I miss? I miss so many things right now, especially given the move I’ve made across the country.

The thing I spent most of the last year (and longer) missing was a sense of security, AKA, a place to call home. Luckily, I always have a home where my family is. But the thing I missed was my routine. I loved certain aspects my life held… certain things that made it feel like it wouldn’t change.

And it did! So there was a period of time where I moved around, my belongings dwindled down to what I could fit into my car, and I set out in search of that security….

Which I’m finding out, is all in my head. It isn’t an address. It isn’t a person. It’s me, and whatever I have going on inside me. I’m spending less time missing my past and more time enjoying what I have right in front of me.

But, ahem, I really do miss someone in particular. All philosophical ideas aside, I downright miss the hell out of my twin sister right now.

It’s the longest I’ve ever been without her. 

The last time we were apart for more than three weeks (which I’m pretty sure WAS the longest….) was when she went to England and our dates for certain out of town journeys intersected and we spent an entire month apart. I cried my eyes out more than once. She’s like a security blanket. I like borrowing her clothes. On any random afternoon we both had off, we’d drive around and listen to music and laugh until we cried. I don’t have to explain much to her, she just gets everything. She calls me out on my b.s. She pats my back when I’m sad. She sends me hilarious pictures with the most perfect captions and makes me laugh. She is a rock. She is an island. 

I’m really missing Meredith right now.



I guess I’m learning how to be on my own, and this is the #1 struggle. In a way, the distance has brought us closer, and LUCKILY, she did visit me already. We laughed in our beds into the night, just like when we were little.

Dude, you’re the best. I’m so glad I’m a twin. I’m so glad I’m your twin. And I MITH YOU LIKE CRAZY!


That is about all, or else I really might start sobbing in the public library, where I am currently using the internet.


Twin(less-for-now) Lou

Author: Melinda Haas

Melinda is a writer, blogger, artist and teacher. She lives in Wisconsin with her family.

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