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The Grey Matters

If You’re Going To Judge

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Blog Everyday in May Challenge

Day 8: A piece of advice you have for others. Anything at all. 

“Judge people based on their best day, not their worst.” – paraphrased from Piper Kerman

I saw the author of Orange Is the New Black speak at UNM this past year and it was a life changing experience. She’s been to jail. She spoke about the outrageous problems there are with prisons in this country – especially the problems with women’s prisons. Her quote was particularly poignant.

I mean, I’ve felt this way (not exactly an eye for an eye sort of way) ever since I started listening to Johnny Cash and found that I had a stirring in my soul concerning who was in prison, for how long, and why. How long must we pay our dues? That’s a tough question to answer.


I’d be a liar and a cheater and thief and untrustworthy and mean and awful and rude and uptight and hasty the list goes on and on and on.

And I’d deserve no less than jail time.

But you see (breathing, calm voice here), that was a worst day.

On my best day I know I was kind and gracious and loving and patient and easygoing and calm and open.

On my best day, which I hope to be judged for, I’m a good person.

Today’s blog is short and sweet because this thought is short and sweet and doesn’t even take that much effort to live by. I think we should start looking at people differently.

“There isn’t anyone you wouldn’t come to like if you could hear their whole story.” – some random Pinterest quote

I struggle with this in my every day life; we all do. However, I have seen changes as far as how I think of people once I do learn more about them. That annoying quirk could be something they developed because of their parents. That way they have of boasting about everything could be due to a lifetime of never being appreciated by those who should appreciate them most.


I know I’m no angel.

If I had any advice to give, and anything to remind myself of daily, it would be to start judging (or better yet, just STOP JUDGING….) people based on their best attributes, their best moments, and start considering why the worst moments happen.

It’s a life changer, for sure.





Author: Melinda Haas

Melinda is a writer, blogger, artist and teacher. She lives in Wisconsin with her family.

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